Hotter than Hell

Remember that old saying, “If you think it’s hot here, wait ‘til you get to hell” – and I’m not talking about Hell, Michigan.  That saying has been around for years and still seems to have impact.  Yes, it’s hot, but I don’t think it’s hotter than hell; we shouldn’t joke about it.

Hot is an adjective to describe, well, ‘extreme heat.’ Hot, hotter, hottest.  It means to give off heat, having a high temperature, a hot fire…having or causing a sensation of great bodily heat, like hot with fever.  Creating a burning sensation, as on the skin or in the throat…sharply peppery or pungent, also showing intense or violent feelings (a hot temper).

No matter how we describe ‘hot’ – it’s hot, hotter than hot.  But in comparison to hell, where a continual fire burns and thirst cannot be quenched – dealing with this extreme heat isn’t all that bad. If this weather makes you grumpy and gloomy, just take time to sit and think how much better this world is, weather and all, then hell.  Of course, it won’t cheer you up much if you expect to go there. Don Marquis (paraphrased)

“Whether the weather be fine, whether the weather be not, whether the weather be cold, whether the weather be hot, we’ll weather the weather, whatever the whether, Whether we like it or not” Author unknown

Inconclusive Travel Plans

It’s almost summer; time to make some travel plans, right?  Where should I go this year? What should I do for some R&R?

I have been in many places, but I've never been in  Cahoots. Apparently, you can't go alone. You have to be in Cahoots with someone.

I've also never been in  Cognito. I hear no one recognizes you there.

I have, however, been in Sane. They don't have an airport;  you have to be driven there. I have made several trips there, thanks to my friends, family and work.

I would like to go to  Conclusions, but you have to jump, and I'm not too much on physical activity anymore.

I have also been  in Doubt. That is a sad place to go, and I try not to visit there too often.

I've been in Flexible, but only when  it was very important to stand firm.

Sometimes I'm in Capable, and I go there more often as I'm getting older.

One of my favorite places to be is in Suspense! It really gets the adrenalin flowing and pumps up the old heart! At my age I need all the stimuli I can get! 

I may have been in Continent --I don't remember what  country I was in. It's an age thing.

PLEASE DO YOUR PART!

Today is one of the many National Mental Health Days throughout the year. You can do your bit by remembering to send an e-mail note or make a phone call to at least one unstable person in your life.  If you do that, my job is done!

Life is too short for negative drama and petty things. So laugh insanely, love truly and forgive quickly!  From one unstable person to another.  I hope everyone is happy in your head - we're all doing pretty good in mine!   Have a great day.

Mother - Another Name For Love

God sure knew what He was doing when he created mothers. They are truly "special" people-dear to God's own heart.

I don't know how they do it, but mothers seem to have a special ability to share their lives with others. They give unconditionally to their mates, their children, the church and the community without complaint. They are honest in word and deed; sincere and compassionate, making sure that love is part of everything they do.

They are not afraid of being vulnerable; they believe in uniqueness and in fact encourage it, not only in their own lives, but also in the lives of others. They are proud of who they are and know that their job "mother" is the best in job in the world!

Mothers seem to have a sixth sense. They allow themselves the pleasure of being close to their families; they know what's going on in their household and always seem to have an answer to every question, a solution to every problem. No matter how busy a mother is preparing for her day, she still has time to care about the happiness of others.

And even at the end of a day a mother's work isn't finish-there's always laundry to do, a room to be straightened, prayers to be said.

Now that I'm a mother and a grandmother, I have come to understand that the love of a mother makes all the difference in life and mothers truly are special people who make life beautiful. Happy Mother's Day to mother’s everywhere!

This article first appeared in the Crossroads May 2001

The Wind in our Lives

Whoever penned the phrase ‘April showers’ should change it to April winds.  April showers bring May flowers but the winds drive friends away.  OK, I made that last part up.  Lying in bed listening to the wind beating against my window makes me think of the book “Gilberto and the Wind” by Marie Hall Ets.  It was a favorite book to read to the kids when they growing up and the wind freighted them.

At first the wind is Gilberto’s friend, gently floating his balloon around in the air.  The story tells of the winds many escapades, blowing through the laundry hanging on the line or how Wind would blow the gate to the back yard around and how much fun it was to climb up on the gate for a free ride or how Wind moved the tall grass in the meadow, and how thrilling it was to race with the wind.

But when the wind tries to take your umbrella away from you or catches your kite in a tree and breaks it, then, the wind is no longer Gilberto friend.  When the wind becomes so strong that it starts breaking the trees in half, and knocking fences down, Gilberto runs into the house, locks the door and whispers, “No Wind go away.”

When stormy winds invade our lives, when we find ourselves in the valley longing for the mountain top; when we think we might not make it through one more tumultuous storm, all we have to do is look up and know that even in the storms of life, even when the wind frightens us, God is with us.  He will never leave us nor forsake us.

God never promised us a rose garden, along with the sunshine, comes a little bit of rain, sometimes…but when the sun finally comes out again and the wind is just right to sail a paper boat…”when the day comes that Wind is all tired out, (like Gilberto in our story), we can say, “Wind, Oh Wind where are you?”  “Sh-sh-sh-sh,” answers the wind, and he stirs one dry leaf to show where he is.

Just like God shows us every day where He is. “Sh-sh-sh-sh…be still and know that I am God.”  Just like Gilberto lay down next to the wind under the willow tree, we can lie down next to God and go to sleep beside him and know that He will take care of us – even in the windy storms.

I Peter 5:7 - "...casting all your anxiety upon Him for He cares for you."

ROMANCE

An older couple was lying in bed one night. The husband was falling asleep, but the wife was in a romantic mood and wanted to talk.

She said: "You used to hold my hand when we were courting."
Wearily he reached across, held her hand for a second and tried to get back to sleep.

A few moments later she said: "Then you used to kiss me."
Mildly irritated, he reached across, gave her a peck on the cheek and settled down to sleep.

Thirty seconds later she said: "Then you used to bite my neck."

Angrily, he threw back the bed covers and got out of bed.
"Where are you going?" she asked.
"To get my teeth!" He replied.

Ah, the joys of senior romance. Thanks to my friend, Lisa, for sharing this. I needed to be reminded of what the future holds for me in the area of romance. Should I be worried?

“Happy is the man who has broken the chains which hurt the mind, and has given up worrying once and for all.” Ovid.

Sounds like good advice to me.

Happy Valentine's Day♥

A little bit of 'love' wisdom goes a long way.

-Where love is there God is.

-We may give without loving but we can't love without giving.

- Work is love made visible.

-Love cannot be wasted. It makes no difference where it is
bestowed, it always brings in big returns.

-Love is not like soft water, it is hard like a rock...

-It is in loving, not in being loved, the heart is blessed...

From the book "Apples of Gold"
published by the C.R. Gibson Company

Scroll down and be sure to read my February Valentine's article.

Things learned in 2011

2011 is over, but oh, the things I’ve learned. I want to thank my friends for all the educational e-mails I received over the past year. I am totally screwed up now and have little chance of recovery.

I can no longer open a bathroom door without using a paper towel, nor let the waitress put lemon slices in my ice water without worrying about the bacteria on the lemon peel.

I can't sit down on a hotel bedspread because I can only imagine what has happened on it since it was last washed.

I have trouble shaking hands with someone who has been driving because the number one pastime while driving alone is picking one's nose.

Eating a little snack sends me on a guilt trip because I can only imagine how many gallons of Trans fats I have consumed over the years.

I can't touch any woman's handbag for fear she has placed it on the floor of a public toilet.

I MUST SEND MY SPECIAL THANKS for the email about rat poo in the glue on envelopes because I now have to use a wet sponge with every envelope that I seal. Also, now I have to scrub the top of every can I open for the same reason.

I can't eat at KFC because their chickens are actually horrible mutant freaks with no eyes, feet or feathers.

I can't use cancer-causing deodorants even though I smell like a water buffalo on a hot day.

Thanks to those chain letters, I have learned that my prayers only get answered if I forward an e-mail to seven of my friends and make a wish within five minutes.

Because of concerned Internet friends, I no longer drink Coca Cola because it can remove toilet stains! I can’t imagine what it’s doing to my stomach!

I no longer buy fuel without taking someone along to watch the car, so a serial killer doesn't crawl in my back seat when I'm filling up.

I no longer use Cling Wrap in the microwave because it causes seven different types of cancer. And, it’s good to know that I can't boil a cup of water in the microwave anymore because it will blow up in my face, disfiguring me for life.

I no longer go to the cinema because I could be pricked with a needle infected with AIDS when I sit down.

I no longer go to shopping centers because someone will drug me with a perfume sample and rob me.

And I no longer answer the phone because someone will ask me to dial a number for which I will get a huge phone bill with calls to Jamaica, Uganda, Singapore and Uzbekistan.

AND THANKS TO MORE GREAT ADVICE I can't ever pick up a dime dropped in the parking lot because it was probably placed there by a sex molester waiting to grab me as I bend over.

I can't do any gardening because I'm afraid I'll get bitten by the Violin Spider and my hand will fall off.

If you don't share this information with at least 144,000 people in the next 70 minutes, a large dove with diarrhea will land on your head at 5:00p.m. tomorrow afternoon, and the fleas from 120 camels will infest your back, causing you to grow a hairy hump. I know this will occur because it actually happened to a friend of my next door neighbor’s ex-mother-in-law's second husband's cousin's best friend's beautician.

Oh, and by the way, if you should receive an email with this advice, you should know, a German scientist from Argentina, after a lengthy study, has discovered that people with insufficient brain activity read their e-mails with their hand on the mouse.It's to late to correct it now so don't worry about it.

P. S. I now keep my toothbrush in the living room, because I was told by e-mail that water splashes over 6 ft. out of the toilet.

I thank my sister-in-law for sharing this information with me.I laughed myself silly when I read it. I bet you did, too. Remember, if you laugh too hard your teeth will fall out. Mine feel a little loose, I Should probably call my dentist.

I leave with this note, a Connism, if you will, do not be conformed to the things of this world. Place your confidence in Jesus Christ, He’ll protect us from every wind doctrine. (Ephesians 4:14).

HAVE YOURSELF A VERY GOOD DAY IF YOU CAN.